10. "And if you're lucky, I mean if you're the luckiest person on this entire planet, the person you love decides to love you back..." ~Nathan Scott
Actually, Nathan, what you just described is fairly common and typically results in what we call a "happy marriage." I know that term is unfathomable to douchebags, but it's what can result from actually cultivating a relationship instead of running away at the first sign of trouble. It's a wild concept.
9. Haley: Stay the hell away from my husband.
Rachel: I was just giving him a proper thank you.
Haley: Please, your thank you's send people to the free clinic.
Brooke: What are you laughing at? Your "I love you's" send people to their grave.
Peyton: Well in that case, I love you, Brooke.
This one's tough to analyze, as I don't watch the show and there are four birds tweeting incessantly in this quote. I'm sure the director had soundproof headphones equipped while shooting this scene. What I'm getting from this is that "Haley" and "Peyton" are two main characters in the show, people the audience "relates to" and "sympathizes with." Also, they are very spunky and witty in a freshman year sort of way. Am I on target here? I feel like I am.
8. Lucas: You ever look a picture of yourself and see a stranger in the background? It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other people's lives have we been in? Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died? Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone else's life and not even know it.
If Lucas's ecstasy dealer happens to be reading this, my name is Luke and you can contact me via Twitter. The character of Lucas is played by Chad Michael Murray. I know him from Freaky Friday. And by Freaky Friday I of course mean A Cinderella Story. He's about to turn 29 and is somehow still landing high school roles. He's like a skinnier, more annoying Jonah Hill.
7. Ellie: Every song has a CODA, a final movement. Whether it fades out or crashes away. Every song ends. Is that any reason not to enjoy the music? The truth is, there is nothing to be afraid of. It's just life.
Hey Ellie, when you say every song ends, it sure sounds to me like you're talking about death, not life. You say we shouldn't fear life? Well, we don't. We fear death. Death is really, really effing scary. Thanks for beginning to address that before bolting in the opposite direction.
6. Most of our lives are a series of images, they pass us by like towns on a highway. But sometimes a moment stuns us as it happens and we know that this instant is more than a fleeting image. We know that this moment, every part of it, will live on forever.
Sing it with me! Highhhh schooool is such a serious thing! These problems matter!
5. Peyton: (voiceover) At this moment there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world. Some are running scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men, at war with good. And some are good, struggling with evil. Six billion people in the world. Six billion souls. And sometimes - all you need is one.
It's not easy to get me to roll my eyes after just one sentence. But Peyton got it done. She's legit. What's more, I rolled my eyes a little bit extra after each sentence until that last line made them rocket upward and cause a brain bleed. "And sometimes - all you need is one." Who writes this? Who WATCHES this? America is screwed.
4. Brooke: LUCAS! Do not make me join you!
Lucas: Uh, a little privacy here.
Brooke: No, you've been in the shower forever! By the time I even get in the water it's gonna be...(Checks water) cold! Are you taking a cold shower?!
Lucas: No, the hot water-
Brooke: Gross! You are! You know what? Next wet dream, tell Peyton I said 'Hi'. Ew!
You think that's bad, Brooke? You know what happens in real life, when you go to an actual high school and are not a proud student at Tree Hill, home of the Ravens? In real life, Lucas is jackhammering his meatstick in the shower, because in real life, wet dreams don't exist and you've got to get the job done yourself. And by the way, are Lucas and Brooke brother and sister? Giant WTF to this scene if they are. The dialogue is bordering on incestual. I'm sure that's what the writers were going for.
3. Haley: Oh, the magazine pages are sticking again you little pervert. Oh hey Luke. You've been reading this?
Lucas: I don't know, Haley. Is that the one that you say 'why do they publish those?' because you're not on the cover, hah?
Haley: No, actually it's the 'my best friend is an idiot' issue and there you are!
Whoever wrote this episode really nailed how kids talk to each other.
2. Nathan: You've got some ugly toes, girl.
Peyton: No, I don't.
Nathan: Yeh, you do. They're practically like fingers.
Peyton: Well, then just focus on the middle one.
1. Lucas: (voiceover)Some people believe that ravens guide travelers to their destinations. Others believe that the sight of a solitary raven is considered good luck. While more than one raven together, predicts trouble ahead (He looks out the window and sees many ravens are flying above the car)
Wow, there is just so much going on here. First of all, good ol' Lucas spotted an unkindness of ravens after his voiceover. That's what we call foreshadowing, kids! Poop is hitting the fan tonight! Also, (and I'm guessing this is far from the only time the writers did this)they wrote ravens into the plot line. Because, you know, you always see your school mascot in the world. For example, at my high school, we were called the Gators. And if you know anything about Chicago suburbs, it's that alligators are everywhere.
Finally, I'm getting a feeling that Lucas is a deep dude. A bunch of other OTH quotes had him citing famous authors in a voiceover. So he's brainy and he enjoys reading. Is that accurate? Well, I enjoy reading too. I don't talk like this. Does anyone talk like this? If you constantly have inner monologues that focus primarily on seeing groups of animals/people and wondering what exactly that means in relation to you, you're a selfish, egotistical douche, and I'm sorry for you. I really am. To illustrate, leave me a comment below and I'll buy all 7 seasons of One Tree Hill and send them to you. And by all 7 seasons I of course mean I'll put 7 of my best poops into a box and mail them to you. You're getting the same thing either way.