Wednesday, June 17, 2009

10 Awesome One Tree Hill Quotes (With Analysis!)

10. "And if you're lucky, I mean if you're the luckiest person on this entire planet, the person you love decides to love you back..." ~Nathan Scott

Actually, Nathan, what you just described is fairly common and typically results in what we call a "happy marriage." I know that term is unfathomable to douchebags, but it's what can result from actually cultivating a relationship instead of running away at the first sign of trouble. It's a wild concept.


9. Haley: Stay the hell away from my husband.
Rachel: I was just giving him a proper thank you.
Haley: Please, your thank you's send people to the free clinic.
Peyton: Ha!!!
Brooke: What are you laughing at? Your "I love you's" send people to their grave.
Peyton: Well in that case, I love you, Brooke.


This one's tough to analyze, as I don't watch the show and there are four birds tweeting incessantly in this quote. I'm sure the director had soundproof headphones equipped while shooting this scene. What I'm getting from this is that "Haley" and "Peyton" are two main characters in the show, people the audience "relates to" and "sympathizes with." Also, they are very spunky and witty in a freshman year sort of way. Am I on target here? I feel like I am.

8. Lucas: You ever look a picture of yourself and see a stranger in the background? It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other people's lives have we been in? Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died? Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone else's life and not even know it.

If Lucas's ecstasy dealer happens to be reading this, my name is Luke and you can contact me via Twitter. The character of Lucas is played by Chad Michael Murray. I know him from Freaky Friday. And by Freaky Friday I of course mean A Cinderella Story. He's about to turn 29 and is somehow still landing high school roles. He's like a skinnier, more annoying Jonah Hill.


7. Ellie: Every song has a CODA, a final movement. Whether it fades out or crashes away. Every song ends. Is that any reason not to enjoy the music? The truth is, there is nothing to be afraid of. It's just life.


Hey Ellie, when you say every song ends, it sure sounds to me like you're talking about death, not life. You say we shouldn't fear life? Well, we don't. We fear death. Death is really, really effing scary. Thanks for beginning to address that before bolting in the opposite direction.


6. Most of our lives are a series of images, they pass us by like towns on a highway. But sometimes a moment stuns us as it happens and we know that this instant is more than a fleeting image. We know that this moment, every part of it, will live on forever.


Sing it with me! Highhhh schooool is such a serious thing! These problems matter!

5. Peyton: (voiceover) At this moment there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world. Some are running scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men, at war with good. And some are good, struggling with evil. Six billion people in the world. Six billion souls. And sometimes - all you need is one.

It's not easy to get me to roll my eyes after just one sentence. But Peyton got it done. She's legit. What's more, I rolled my eyes a little bit extra after each sentence until that last line made them rocket upward and cause a brain bleed. "And sometimes - all you need is one." Who writes this? Who WATCHES this? America is screwed.


4. Brooke: LUCAS! Do not make me join you!
Lucas: Uh, a little privacy here.
Brooke: No, you've been in the shower forever! By the time I even get in the water it's gonna be...(Checks water) cold! Are you taking a cold shower?!
Lucas: No, the hot water-
Brooke: Gross! You are! You know what? Next wet dream, tell Peyton I said 'Hi'. Ew!


You think that's bad, Brooke? You know what happens in real life, when you go to an actual high school and are not a proud student at Tree Hill, home of the Ravens? In real life, Lucas is jackhammering his meatstick in the shower, because in real life, wet dreams don't exist and you've got to get the job done yourself. And by the way, are Lucas and Brooke brother and sister? Giant WTF to this scene if they are. The dialogue is bordering on incestual. I'm sure that's what the writers were going for.

3. Haley: Oh, the magazine pages are sticking again you little pervert. Oh hey Luke. You've been reading this?
Lucas: I don't know, Haley. Is that the one that you say 'why do they publish those?' because you're not on the cover, hah?
Haley: No, actually it's the 'my best friend is an idiot' issue and there you are!


Whoever wrote this episode really nailed how kids talk to each other.

2. Nathan: You've got some ugly toes, girl.
Peyton: No, I don't.
Nathan: Yeh, you do. They're practically like fingers.
Peyton: Well, then just focus on the middle one.


Classic Peyton!


1. Lucas: (voiceover)Some people believe that ravens guide travelers to their destinations. Others believe that the sight of a solitary raven is considered good luck. While more than one raven together, predicts trouble ahead (He looks out the window and sees many ravens are flying above the car)


Wow, there is just so much going on here. First of all, good ol' Lucas spotted an unkindness of ravens after his voiceover. That's what we call foreshadowing, kids! Poop is hitting the fan tonight! Also, (and I'm guessing this is far from the only time the writers did this)they wrote ravens into the plot line. Because, you know, you always see your school mascot in the world. For example, at my high school, we were called the Gators. And if you know anything about Chicago suburbs, it's that alligators are everywhere.

Finally, I'm getting a feeling that Lucas is a deep dude. A bunch of other OTH quotes had him citing famous authors in a voiceover. So he's brainy and he enjoys reading. Is that accurate? Well, I enjoy reading too. I don't talk like this. Does anyone talk like this? If you constantly have inner monologues that focus primarily on seeing groups of animals/people and wondering what exactly that means in relation to you, you're a selfish, egotistical douche, and I'm sorry for you. I really am. To illustrate, leave me a comment below and I'll buy all 7 seasons of One Tree Hill and send them to you. And by all 7 seasons I of course mean I'll put 7 of my best poops into a box and mail them to you. You're getting the same thing either way.


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16 comments:

  1. Never thought I would read a post about this so A++, but how could you forget "Stay out of it, Nick Lachey"?

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  2. mayb it might sound stupid to some ppl.... in the other hand it changes sum ppl lives >>>>

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  3. i hope it changed your life! I just wished that "mayb" it changes your spelling one day!

    Chromy

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  4. Maybe you should pay attention to to the real point in the show. Everyone goes through hard times, and sometimes- just sometimes- some understanding helps. The show is great. It is relateable. Quotes on the show capture how many people feel, and maybe for a split second they will feel understood. Pay attention to what the show is really doing for people. Do you see how many viewers it has? How many followers of all ages? The whole entire show is relateable to everyone in some way. Maybe, just maybe, you need to get a life and stop trashing a show that seems so "pointless" to you. Highschool does matter. It makes people who they are today. Those years, believe it or not, shape your life. And obviously, nobody cared for you, for there would be more than two pitiful comments here. And one of them is trashing YOU. Hahah, GREAT work here..

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  5. aaaaaaahahahahahahaha anonymous you are so funny! "rock of love bus" also gets a ton of viewers so i bet you think that show is good for the mind, body, and soul. if you take what you see on tv seriously then i am just guessing that you have no friends. well i guess you have friends like chad michael murray so good job. that show should have no effect on people other than for entertainment. and i really wouldnt call it "entertainment"

    p.s.
    way to be anonymous. coward

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  6. Maybe you should pay attention to to the real point in the show. Everyone goes through "hard" times, and sometimes- just sometimes- some general knowledge of real life helps. The show is simply awful. It is unrelateable. Quotes on the show capture how no people feel, and maybe for a split second they will feel nothing for these "people". Pay attention to how the show makes no sense. Do you see how many viewers of the show are stupid? How many followers hate themselves? The whole entire show is relateable to maybe one person. Maybe, just maybe, you you nailed the stupidy of this show in ten quotes. Highschool doesn't matter. It doesn't make people who they are. Those years, believe it or not, dont matter that much in real life. And obviously, someone cared for you, you're mother must be proud, GREAT work here..

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  7. ANONYMOUS: AGREED.
    ONE TREE HILL IS LIFE & IT TALKS ABOUT REAL THINGS AND SITUATIONS THAT PEOPLE FACE EVERY DAY.

    SO GET A LIFE AND STOP TRASHING ONE TREE HILL!

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  8. Wow - "One Tree Hill is life..." wait... I mean "ONE TREE HILL IS LIFE".... Let me tell you, OTH is not life, not even fucking close. It has situations that middle class white people face - sometimes.

    P.S. People don't take you seriously and loose respect for you if you type in all caps. Unless of course you meant to yell all that.

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  9. Mike, Mike, Mike...never mock the guy with the blog unless you are totally sure you are right.

    1. I'M SORRY YOU "LOOSE" ALL RESPECT FOR ME IF I TYPE IN CAPS - IT'S MY BLOG. I understand the difference between the two, YOU OBVIOUSLY MISSED A DAY OF SPELLING CLASS.

    2. YOU ARE EITHER TOO LAZY TO READ THE FULL POST IN WHICH I SHRED THE SHOW FOR BEING JUST WHAT YOU EXPLAIN IT IS OR....

    YOU'RE TOO SLOW TO RECOGNIZE THE SARCASM IN THE TITLE.

    EITHER WAY, THERE'S THE DOOR, DON'T LET IT HIT YOU ON YOUR WAY OUT.

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  10. Mike is not a moron, I am.

    See, good posters, like Luke, will actually read the comments prior to crucifying to ensure they are deserving of such treatment.

    I on the other hand just enjoy freaking out and insulting people for the s and g's of it.

    Since we have three readers, probably should make sure we keep them.

    Mike is smart. See everyone else who isn't that has kept this going? He's smart, you are not.

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  11. Maybe- what is your name? Awesome?- you should get a life. Whether someone even likes this show or not, why do you even CARE? You have three reads, so it's not like your changing the world from watching this show. So what's the point? Just for "kicks"? Why don't you go read a book or two, sounds like you need it. Maybe get a real job. Or go watch stupid YouTube videos? That would be much, much more productive than this.

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  12. Doucheba....er....Taylor,

    I have a job, I run a very profitable hotel. So go screw yourself. Take this time to practice your, "You want fries with that?"

    I don't think I'm changing the world, I just have a chance to tell morons, i.e., you, to go screw themselves because I can. I don't care if I have zero reads, you took the time to come to this worthless page with three reads and tell me I'm stupid. I apparently struck a chrord you, douchbag...sorry again, Taylor.

    I've had time to read 9 books so far this calendar year; including two about physics, one about Albert Einstein, one about the history of Democratic party. All of which I comprehended. So, if you are tryinig to call me dumb, you lose, again. I'm not reading Goosebumps.

    Awesome is my name, I pwned you, don't wear it out. I'm going to go watch AWESOME You Tube videos. Go ahead and comment again to prove my point. K? Okayloveyoubye.

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  13. This is my all time favorite show. And there's A LOT more behind those quotes than just being on a high school tv show. They give people hope when they feel like they don't have any and they inspire people. If you don't like the show, don't watch it. No need to trash it. I just want to read the quotes, no one wants to see all this bitching.

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  14. luke youre my favorite

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  15. Why/how are people still commenting on this? It was two months ago. Three people read this blog, two of which are the writers. Even more puzzling, how did you find it? How much time did you spend? I'm pretty sure if I were building an army, I would want nothing but OTH fanboys because you are definitely persistent/blindly faithful little SOBs.

    The power of words. Jeesh.

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  16. If you don't like the show, why would you take all this time to make a page on the internet just to talk about it? Doesn't really make sense to me. You could've done something productive with your time instead of bringing something down like that. If you don't like it, don't trash talk it, just don't talk about it at all. Just think... it would save all these pointless arguements on the internet with someone you've probably never even met. Come on guys, let's grow up.

    haley

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