Monday, April 26, 2010

Happy Boobquake Day! Also, Two Reasons I'm Quitting Twitter

Today is National (Global?) Boobquake Day, inspired by the knowledge of a Middle Eastern cleric. He has the inside scoop on what causes earthquakes. It's not seismic waves in the Earth's crust, as "science" would lead you to believe. The Iranian media quoted Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi as saying:

"Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes."

I've never seen a quote that went from wise to batshit insane so quickly. Exposed women lead young men astray? Sure, I can see that. They corrupt their chastity and spread adultery? Well, okay, maybe a little sexist, but I catch your drift. This behavior increases earthquakes?

Wait. What?

So to determine once and for all if this theory holds water, a blogger in West Lafayette (pictured above, I think) has declared today to be Boobquake day. Facebook group here.

Reason #1 I'm Quitting Twitter: I'll never top this tweet.

Reason #2 I'm Quitting Twitter: TOO MANY MEANIES

If you have a Twitter account, you likely have occasional "Wait, why am I following this person?" moments. Here's one of those cases for me. Instead of trying to sum up the utter pointlessness of this guy's updates, here's a screen cap of what he's posted simply in the last day.

twitter fail

So I sent this guy the following:

His reply:

So I'll be canceling my Twitter account just as soon as my tears clear up enough to let me see my monitor.


  1. I don't know what you're talking about, Braden Woodburn is the best. The only way he would be better is if his last name was Cockburn. Then he would win at life x1000000.

  2. I dont mean to play Devil's Advocate here, but there was an earthquake that day. And who the fuck is Braden Woodburn? Why were you even following him? Here's the only thing I could ever tweet.

    Woke up this morning went to work, came home played WOW, beat off dejectedly, sleep...