Monday, January 25, 2010

BREAKING: Brett Favre Has Boo-Boos, Is Sad

Playing in the Sandbox

"Hey u guys watch how hard I can punch the ground lulz"

"Too much jambalaya, imma shit my pants. 64 knows what I'm talkin about!"

"This is my warrior pose. Deanna says old people should do yoga."

"that is totes not the warrior pose omfg he is soooooo dumb you guys"


This may not be clear from the photos, but I genuinely felt bad for Brett Favre when his last pass attempt was an interception for his second straight postseason. Some of the images of him after said pick are downright heartbreaking (proof). The man knew that a vast majority of the country was still holding a grudge against him for taking so long to decide whether or not to play this year. We waited the entire season for him to show his age or blow a game with his legendary gunslinger mentality, but he responded by playing some of the best football of his career. Until his final pass.

Undoubtedly he'll see film of the play and notice the open field available to him. He could have scrambled for 10, maybe 15 yards, setting up a Ryan Longwell chipshot similar to the 40-yarder that won the game in overtime. But Brett Favre doesn't scramble. He fires passes, sometimes ill-advised, with a God-given cannon arm. His last pass was a crucial mistake, and he absolutely knew it and appeared to be completely heartbroken. I really felt for him last night.

So why publish this post? Well, I know what three months of inane sports coverage tastes like. Is Favre coming back? Is he staying retired? To add to this gray-area topic, let's show video of Favre throwing passes in a cutoff t-shirt to high schoolers in Mississippi!! This proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Brett Favre may or may not be coming back!

No thanks. This post serves as a preemptive strike against another three months of waffling for breakfast.

My personal favorite picture is #4 (Favre's number! What a coincidence!), the one with Favre's hands on his head, eyes wide, thinking "I've made a huge mistake." Got a sweet caption for one of the photos? Which image is your favorite? Post that shizzy in the comments section.

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  1. Brett Favrehands: A drinking game whereby, rather than taping your beer to your hands, you give your beer to your opponent and then kick yourself in the balls. Then f'ing retire and gtfo.

  2. Brett Farve is so old. Im over it.

  3. Are we done with him yet? I felt bad for 5 minutes, then remembered he has a Super Bowl ring. This isn't Dan Marino getting bounced out on his last try. This guy has every record and tons of money. Should we really feel sorry for the guy?

    Oh, and he's got a smoking hot daughter.

  4. Okay, how do I post a picture on my comment and not just the URL? Anyone?

    In the meantime, this photo (of Brett kneeling,) is brought to us by Jacobsohn/Getty

    Please dear God, please let it be over. My ankle hurts.